Driven.: Blame it on the Sugar!

Chanon

My nephew stopped up for a quick visit the other day.  His shirt said it all.  It speaks to me at a level that I totally get.   I would like to blame everything other than myself and my choices when it comes to my weight and health.   But the truth is.... It's still my choice, it's  no one else's responsibility or fault.
Today was a big day for me, I finally made time to go join the gym. No, I didn't have time to workout, but I have my membership and an appointment to meet the fitness guru for an orientation next week. I am already carving out time to make it there 3 times next week.... For anyone that doesn't know me well... My biggest form of exercise over the last 10 years has been walking.  (Not increasing my heart rate). Sure I've thrown in a video or two and committed to that that foe a week or two.... But I really haven't done my heart any favors in this department.  I am excited to have an appointment on my calendar that says ... I love myself enough to take time out for me.
That is a hard thing for me to say... It's actually a hard concept for  me  to grasp.  I've made every excuse as to why "me time" is selfish, self centered, vain, etc.  You name it, I've thought it.  However, after some true soul searching I've realized these are all excuses to keep me right where I was and that was an unhealthy mess who didn't believe I was worth the time it takes to work on my body and ultimately my health.
I've turned over a new page. I am leaving tomorrow for a 48hour personal reset retreat with my sister and niece.  I am going to try Yoga for the very first time! I am going to take time for me.
My sweet children will be home being well taken care of by their daddy and I can rest assured that I am worth the time it takes to focus on my health.
I have seen 4 more pounds disappear from the scale. ( 223 current weight)  My most important number that I am concerned with is my A1C sugar count and I'll have to wait until the end of June to get that tested again. I can say that by feeding my body correctly and cutting out processed sugars 90% of the time, I am no longer craving it!!! I feel so free.  Sure I can choose to enjoy a sweet treat- but I'm not being controlled by it anymore.  I have found I am satisfied with a bite or two- which seriously seems like a miracle to me.
Ill leave you with this thought. I was talking to a dad of a lacrosse player on my sons team and he said something very profound to me.  After listening to Amy and I talking about sugar detoxing and exercising for quite a while... He said this, " you know it's great that you gals are being honest with each other. Most of the time women tell each other not to worry about their weight- or they say things like it doesn't matter- enjoy the moment. They are trying to justify to one another that being careless about their health is ok.  And that is the  biggest lie you could tell one another."  " if you truly care about one another, you would encourage good healthy lifestyles."  That has had me thinking quite a bit.  I think next week I'll expand on my thoughts about it.  For today I will say, I appreciate the encouragement and the grace as I trudge this journey. I certainly hope to extend the same encouragement and grace to others.